Parashat Vayishlach (Genesis 32:4 - 36:43)

Summary

Another action-packed Torah portion dealing with the journeys, stories and lore from our ancient ancestors. Having left Laban's house with his four wives, 12 children and a wealthy entourage, Jacob exile from the Land and his parent's home draws to a close. First he must be reconciled with his brother Esau. Jacob arranges his household and gives them abundant gifts for his brother and sends them over the Jabbok River. He stays the night on the far side of the Jabbok, a night in which he meets his God. A "man" wrestles with him and as morning breaks, he is injured, blessed and renamed, Israel—the one who struggles with God. that morning, Jacob and Esau are reunited.

There follows the account of the 'Rape of Dinah' and the subsequent bloody retribution that Simeon and Levi took on the people of Shechem.

The parasha concludes with God reminding Jacob of his promise to offer praises to God if he is returned safely to his father's house; and a series of lifecycle events. Deborah, Rebekah's nurse dies, Rachel dies and was buried on the road to Bethlehem following the birth of Benjamin and finally on reaching his father's home, Isaac dies and is buried by Esau and Jacob. The genealogies of Esau and Jacob are then cited.

Commentary

Then Deborah, Rebekah's nurse, died and was buried below Beth El under the Oak, so he named it Oak of Weeping. (Gen 35:8).

Rachel died and was buried on the road to Ephrath, that is, Bethleham, and Jacob set up a pillar by her burial site; it is the monument at Rachel's tomb to this day. (Gen 35:19-20)

Jacob came to his father, Isaac, at Mamre near Kiriath-arba (that is, Hebron), where Abraham and Isaac had sojourned. The years of Isaac's life came to 180. Isaac then breathed his last and died; he was gathered to his people old and full of years, and his sons Esau and Jacob buried him. (Gen 35:27-29).

There are many chronological and textual problems with the end of this parasha but the theme of life and in particular death, runs through them. Each in its own way reflects an aspect that contributes to the notion of kibud hamet, honour towards the dead.

For me, the parasha presents some concerns. At a simple reading, it seems that pays more attention and respect to Deborah, Rebekah's nurse, a servant of the household than to Rachel and Isaac. Rachel is buried along the way and not brought to the family burial plot and as for Isaac, it seems that Jacob only returns at the time of his father's death rather than to be with during the last period of his life. Indeed, on a number of accounts, Jacob is criticised by the Ancient Rabbis for delaying his return to his father's home and his delay in completing his vow made with God when he left home.

I also have concerns about the way that our society and Communities seem to be moving in terms of the time and attention we set aside for kibud hamet. It seems that we, like Jacob, seek the support of those around us when we are in difficulties and I am sure that you, like me, have uttered vows under our breath that if a situation is righted, we will do or act something to acknowledge our turn in fortunes. However, we then get wrapped up in our busy lives again and leave little time to acknowledge the moment.

Similarly, as our lives get busier and busier, I see fewer people attending funerals and homes for shiva prayers. Liberal Judaism rejected the concept of minyan, as an exclusive notion. However, the value that people take responsibility for supporting others in their time of need—attending a funeral to pay respect to the dead and to support the living, rather than assuming that someone else will attend or even more probably, that they are 'just too busy,'—strikes me as one that we should revisit.

As our greatest medieval biblical commentator, Rashi (on Gen 47:19) states: "Kindness that is done for the dead is a true act of kindness, since one does it without expectation of any repayment."

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